How to plan for retirement when your goals don’t match your spouse’s

My spouse wants to spend our retirement travelling, but I’d rather stay close to home. How do we build a financial plan when our goals don’t align?

We asked Shawn Cooper, CFP, senior total wealth planner at Scotia Wealth Management, to answer this one.

Differences in goals and priorities for retirement are completely normal in any relationship. Add to that the fact that couples in Canada rarely retire at the same time.

“In fact, when it comes to retirement, one of the most common challenges couples face is having different visions for how they want to spend their ‘golden years,’” Mr. Cooper said. “One spouse may dream of travelling the world, while the other prefers staying close to home, spending time with family, pursuing hobbies, volunteering or simply enjoying a slower pace of life.”

The key, he advised, is to start the conversation early and revisit it often. Many people spend years focusing on the financial aspects of retirement – such as savings, investments, pensions and paying down debt – but spend far less time discussing how they actually want to live in retirement.

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Understanding each person’s goals and expectations is just as important as determining whether they’re financially achievable. Mr. Cooper suggested that a good starting point is to explore each person’s vision for retirement.

“Discuss how you hope to spend your time, what activities are important to you and what you hope to accomplish during this stage of life,” he said. “These conversations can uncover differing views, but they also create an opportunity to find common ground before retirement arrives.”

When one spouse wants to travel and the other does not, it can be helpful to understand the motivation behind the goals. Mr. Cooper suggested you ask yourselves these questions: Is travel about adventure, creating memories, experiencing new cultures or spending time together? Is staying close to home driven by comfort, family connections, community involvement or concerns about health and cost? Once couples understand the “why” behind each other’s preferences, finding a compromise becomes easier, he added.

“Having a comprehensive financial plan can help couples evaluate different scenarios and balance competing priorities,” Mr. Cooper said. “It can incorporate travel goals, while accounting for other priorities, including health care costs, lifestyle spending and future needs.”

He also pointed out that many retirees find that the early retirement years are the best time for travel, when health and mobility are usually at their peak. And, he’s observed that some couples intentionally choose to prioritize travel during the first five to 10 years of retirement, then reduce it over time.

Ultimately, retirement planning is about aligning finances with lifestyle goals. “A thoughtful plan can help couples evaluate trade-offs, prioritize what matters most and make informed decisions about how to allocate their resources over time,” Mr. Cooper said. “By discussing goals early and often, couples can create a retirement plan that supports both partners and the life they want to build together.”

Do you want advice on a financial planning or retirement issue that’s affecting you? Send us an e-mail.